Invisible

"Who are you?", I asked myself over and over again, but I still can't find the right words to define myself. Perhaps I should create a new word to describe "me", and put it into the dictionary; that'll be simply absurd. If I were to choose, right at this moment, I would pick this word, "imperfect".

Yes, no one is perfect, including myself. Sometimes, I never meant to do the things that I did. Sometimes, I just wanted to hide who I am inside, that weak girl. Sometimes, I just wanted to start over certain parts of my life, at least not re-doing the mistakes I did. Sometimes, I fail to do things I wanted to do. Not to mention, all the sharp swords piercing my mind, heart, and even my soul. "you think way too much", well, I am sorry for not being invincible.

Would you, you, and you make me invisible? I do not need attention if it will only snatch away my freedom to be who I am, to cry, to be angry, to be gloomy.. I am sorry, I am not that perfect little miss sunshine; I am a human being with ups and downs. You may say I am the one standing at the center stage, but deep inside, all I want to be is that rock at the back corner of the stage.

Love Him, You, and Them

"Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it : 'Love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22 : 37-38

In these verses that I shared above, I'd like to discuss about the bolded phrase, LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.

Sometimes, we are so focused with the part which tells us to love our neighbor, but we neglect the part that tells us about how we shall love them,

Yes, we shall love them like we love ourselves. Now the question is "Do you love you?"

People would automatically say, "Of course I love myself!"

Do you look down on yourself?

Do you ever wonder why you are you?

Are you wishing you are living someone else's life?

Have you had any desire to be more or less this or that?

If there's any whisper of a "yes" in your deepest heart to any one or more of these questions, then you are not loving yourself. If you love others these ways then you will only set expectations over them.

You might reach out your hands to them, but in your thoughts you spare some rooms for those people to be more of how you want them to be.

"Oh! They're just small kids."

"Why are they so nagging?"

"Can they be a bit more like others?"

"How I wish they're easier to be calmed down..."

LOVE is GOD.

God never expects us to be someone else to be loved by Him.

If you want to love people, love God first, love what God has created, you, then you can learn to love others.

Living Appreciatively

Do you know why some people see life as a chaos?

It's because they see others' worlds as flawless crystals.

Like me, I was afraid to appear "broken" among the fragile glasses full of happiness.

Insecurity filled me up as I went against other people's judgement. Yes, it is the nature of human to generalize, seeing the feathered creatures as those which fly. Well, what if I am a penguin who swims or an ostrich who runs? Do I need to be sorry because I am "me"?

I learned to say NO to that question today. They might have the sky, some might roam around the land, while the rest could float on the sea. All have their own paths in life but only one destination, happiness and peace. Stop considering yourself as a mess and appreciate life with all that comes with it.